I wake up every morning, have a conversation with my cat, take a shower. You know, the usual stuff. I'm just like everyone else. I get dressed, go to school, attend my classes and complete most of my homework assignments. But if I'm just like everyone else, why do I feel like such a loner? I don't want to be the typical teenage televised drama show. The loner teenager who get's pregnant or finds love in a hierarchy above her. No, I want to write my own story.
I feel alienated by my peers. They stare or gawk at me like I just stepped off of a UFO. Can I blame them? No, not at all. When I've confronted my grandma with this problem, she either tells me it's all in my head or that I'm the one who wants them to stare, with the way that I dress. And maybe it is in my head. It's very possible. I overexaggerate the few glances I get into a hundred eyes looking at me. I've been known to be paranoid, I mean why would they want to stare anyway? I'm just like them. I'm just like anyone else.
But do I want them to stare? I want to express myself, that's my passion. I will admit that I do find some of the responses I encounter a little funny. Like when I'm talking a little too loudly about an uncomfortable or odd subject. People will overhear and laugh or move away to avoid me. A lot of people just avoid me.
They used to do that in middle school. I'd sit down at a table and people would scramble to get out of their chairs and move to another table, leaving me all by myself. Most of these people hadn't even talked to me before. They'd just taken one look at me and decided that they disliked me. But isn't that similar to everyones middle school experience? Aren't I just like everyone else? Why do I feel like such an outcast?
For now, I'm just living day to day. Things are definetely better than they were in middle school. But I keep with my daily routine, ignore the stares I get. Keep on, keep on. Living my day to day life as a teenage martian.
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